Fear Death | Vedat Kahyalar

Mr. Vedat KAHYALAR
Columnist

Fear of Death
Why Does Modern Man Fear Death So Much?

There was a time when the most natural realities of life were lived inside the home.

Both birth and death were at the center of life.

In Anatolian villages, Ottoman neighborhoods, and many other places in the world, people were born at home and died at home. Death was not something hidden, but a reality that was accepted.

Until recently, solidarity, visits, and consolation in a house where a funeral occurred would last for days. Neighbors would contribute food and support to the bereaved in deeply moving ways. Even chairs and tables were voluntarily carried from neighboring homes.

In earlier times, cemeteries in cities were not pushed outside the city as they are today. In Istanbul around Eyüp, in Bursa’s neighborhood graveyards, around mosques in Konya, and in many other cities, graves were part of daily life. People would pass by cemeteries on their way to work, the market, or the mosque. Thus, death was a constantly remembered truth. When passing near cemeteries, people would recite prayers and begin their day with remembrance and supplication.

Today, however, city centers are filled with banks, shopping malls, and markets. Conversations among people mostly revolve around economic difficulties, high prices, corruption, the inadequacy of politicians, sports, and gossip-like topics about relationships with the opposite sex.

In traditional Turkish-Islamic culture, cemeteries were called “silent cities.” It was believed that there was an invisible bond between the living and the dead. Visits to graves were not only for remembering the dead, but also for the living to reflect upon themselves.

Birth has been handed over to hospitals. Death, on the other hand, has been exiled to the white corridors of hospitals, intensive care units, and the cold drawers of morgues. People often cannot even witness the last breath of their loved ones. Death has become a technical process managed by professional institutions.

Today we live in a very different world.

There used to be a stage called the deathbed state. In that moment, before passing away, Surah Yasin would be recited, and remembrance of faith would be encouraged so that the person could pass away peacefully.

Funeral procedures used to be carried out by knowledgeable family members and neighbors. Today, even washing, shrouding, funeral prayer, and burial are performed by assigned professionals. Even in shortened three-day condolence periods, paid religious officials recite the Qur’an and lead prayers. Although everything appears formally complete, sincerity and genuine spirituality often seem lost.

Modern man does not want to confront death.

Because the modern system is built on youth, speed, pleasure, productivity, consumption, vacation, and economic survival. Death reminds us of something this system dislikes.

For this reason, old age has also become almost invisible. The cosmetics industry has created a multi-billion-dollar market selling the illusion of not aging. Wrinkles are treated as enemies, white hair is hidden, and elderly bodies are kept out of sight. Cosmetic surgeries, beauty centers, fashion, men’s grooming, sports, and spa centers have become central elements of life for those who can afford them. Metrosexual masculinity has become widespread.

Yet in earlier civilizations, old age was not a flaw but a sign of wisdom.

In the stories of Dede Korkut, gray-haired elders were the memory of society. In Turkish tribes, Islamic cities, and even Ancient Greece, the elderly were regarded as representatives of experience. Today, however, in many societies, old age is seen as the end of productivity.

Nursing homes, elderly care centers, and geriatric departments have become increasingly visible. With new medicines and interventions, human lifespan continues to increase day by day.

French thinker Jean Baudrillard considered this one of the greatest ruptures of modern times. According to him, traditional societies accepted death as an inseparable part of life, whereas modern society treats death as a failure of the system. Death is no longer fate, but a “fault” that must be corrected.

The world’s richest people still spend billions in pursuit of immortality. Some freeze their bodies, others build luxury underground shelters hundreds of meters below the earth, and some even descend into disturbing extremes in search of adrenaline and control.

Yet the certain truth has been revealed in the verse:

“Every soul shall taste death.”

“And every soul will taste death. And you will only be given your full compensation on the Day of Resurrection. So he who is drawn away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise has attained success. And what is the life of this world except the enjoyment of delusion.” (Al-Imran 3:185)

No matter how much we try to hide it, death is not the opposite of life. Death is its complementary part.

The most powerful rulers in human history could not change this truth. Pharaohs built pyramids for immortality. Chinese emperors searched for elixirs of life. Alexander the Great conquered half the world but died young. Suleiman the Magnificent died near Szigetvár and was wrapped in a shroud despite all his glory.

Today technology advances, medicine develops, and human life expectancy increases. Yet death does not disappear. It only moves out of sight.

Perhaps one reason for modern man’s anxiety is this. A human who tries to remove death from life also begins to lose the meaning of life itself. Because where death is forgotten, the value of time decreases; where finitude is ignored, humility disappears; and where the end is not considered, the sense of responsibility weakens.

Thinking about death is not pessimism. Real pessimism is living as if death does not exist.

Because only when a person accepts their mortality can they truly understand the value of life.

“When their appointed time arrives, they cannot delay it by even an hour, nor can they advance it.” (An-Nahl 16:61)

Allah asks the disbelievers:

“How many years did you remain on earth?”
“They will say: ‘We remained a day or part of a day; ask those who kept count.’ He will say: ‘You remained only a little—if only you had known.’” (Al-Mu’minun 23:112–114)

Prophet Muhammad described death not as annihilation, but as a transition from this transient world to the eternal hereafter and meeting with the Creator. He advised frequently remembering death, saying that this awareness protects a person from wrongdoing.

Let us leave the final word to the Prophet:

“Remember often the destroyer of pleasures—the death.”